Why do children need a handbook for avoiding danger?
BECAUSE THEY DON’T KNOW ABOUT THE TOOTHBRUSH SNAKE, a tiny snake from Belgium that creeps into bathrooms and lies beside your actual toothbrush. And if you’re not paying attention and put toothpaste on it, IT SHOOTS UP YOUR NOSE. And the only way to get it down is by playing a trumpet.
What top 3 BSTs (Basic Safety Tips) would you give to protect our readers on holiday?
1. DON’T GO ON HOLIDAYS! It’s much too dangerous. Why not just put a tent up in your sitting room and stay at home.
2. Instead of going on a skiing holiday, why not just open your fridge and sit in front of it for ages with a scarf on.
3. If you ever find yourself face to face with a tiger, the only way to scare it off is through breakdance.
Have any of Docter Noel Zone’s BST (Basic Safety Tips) saved your life so far?
Sometimes I forget that they are made up, which is ridiculous, considering I made them up. Docter Noel is scared of the toilet shark, a shark that comes up through the loo if you sit on it for too long. I definitely don’t sit on the loo for as long as I used to.
What advice would you give to any of our young readers who are interested in a career as a comedian or comedy writer?
Just go for it! If you like stand-up comedy, write some jokes and try it out. Do a show at your school or in your front room. Film something silly on a phone and put it on the internet. Write a ridiculous book about how dangerous everything is. No wait, I’ve done that already.
Have you always been interested in writing or was it something that you became more interested in as you got older?
I’ve always liked making things up. In school I loved writing essays. My father is a musician and a writer. For my sixth birthday party, he wrote a play and we all went to see it and afterwards got to meet the actors and stand on the stage. I remember thinking, this seems like a very fun thing to do with your life.
Do you plan to write any more books for children after this one? And if so, would Docter Noel Zone be in any of them?
I really enjoyed writing this book, and as regards future Dangerology, I feel Docter Noel has A LOT more to say. So I’m very pleased that we have a second DANGER IS EVERYWHERE book on the way. There is virtually nothing in the world he doesn't find INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS: hats, kittens, certain letters of the alphabet. The only problem is that I've started to write the way he speaks, which MOVES INTO CAPITAL LETTERS WHEN HE IS YELLING. AND HE YELLS A LOT. So sorry about that.
How old were you when you did your first stand-up comedy gig?
I did my first stand up show when I was 22. I went to my first show when I was 14. I thought about it a lot in the intervening eight years. The show must have gone ok because I’m still doing it today.
What was your favourite children’s book when you were growing up?
I loved a book of Michael Rosen poems called ‘Quick, Let’s Get Out of Here!’ You could read the poems again and again and they were still hilarious, and it had brilliant pictures by Quentin Blake
If you had to describe Danger is Everywhere in 5 words what would they be?
ARGH! SHARK IN MY LOO!